Dear God what a sadist you are

I couldn’t think of anyone but her
She couldn’t think of anyone but him
And we dutifully told our admirers I am not the one for you
Sometimes gladly, sometimes with a tinge of guilt
Dear God, what a sadist you are
You make us fall for people who don’t care
You make us indifferent to those who love
You give us pettiness which we never overcome
And revel in our collective misery
The day I come to you, I will drown you in my tears
Tears of trauma
Tears when I longed for your soothing touch
Tears that trickled down when you choked me
Tears I accumulated over the years when you condemned me to live